Saturday, December 22, 2007

Truckers

It took me 12 hours to get from St. Louis to Dallas on Thursday, but I made it. It was a nerve-racking drive. After all, it was raining, my tires are old and ready to pop, and I'm technically on some kind of probation from all the speeding tickets I've gotten on this drive.
I'm heading down I-44, and a trucker honks at me as I pass him. He starts flashing his brights over and over in my rear-view mirror. I get nervous. I'd just stopped for gas. Was my gas tank open? Were my tires in trouble? Was something wrong with my car?? What?!
He passes me and honks again. Scared, I look over at him to figure out what was up. But instead, he passes me, turns his blinker on, and tries to lead me off the highway. That's when I realized...nothing was wrong with my car. This was a pick up attempt. This trucker found me attractive and decided to get me off the road and into his...cab.
Is it safe to flirt at 75 mph on a highway? In motor vehicles? In the rain? What about that situation was supposed to turn me on?

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Book Buy Guy

At the end of each semester, a textbook buy-back stand sets up in the Domino's Pizza parking lot across from the J-school. Students can sell their text books to these guys for more cash than the bookstore will give them.
This year, the stand is run by this guy who decides to yell come-ons at me every time I walk by. Every time. It's pretty common stuff: "Bye baby! I'll miss you! If I'd known a beautiful lady was coming by, I'd have (fill in blank here)." Terribly clever.
What reeeeeeaally pisses me off is that he treats me like I'm the bitch for "ignoring" him! The first time he yelled at me, I was so taken aback by his assumed familiarity that I physically stopped and stared at him. It wasn't till he yelled something about my brown owl bag that I knew he was talking to me. He treated me like he'd known me for years and like he was sick of me turning him down.
He wasn't even hitting on me! He was acting like he was frustrated at me for being...prude! I DON'T KNOW YOU, BOOK BUY GUY!
I am sick of men lumping me and all other vagina-bearing beings into one inferior category. Yelling at me is NOT hitting on me.

Saturday, December 8, 2007

Bubye, sugar

The roads are icy tonight, and there's a big storm on the way. I didn't have an ice scraper, so I ran into Wal-Mart to buy one. I got to the automotive section to find long stretches of white shelves and two small boxes of 97 cent plastic (and semi-useless) scrapers. I bought two.
I walked back to my car slowly, scared to slip in the icy parking lot. I walked past two men saying good-bye to each other. One of them sees me and says, "Hey, buddy, take this cutie-pie with you."
The other guy turns around, laughs and starts whispering "Hey there, sugar," under his breath.
I keep my head down, annoyed. Then, I hear crunching on the ice. He's actually coming at me.
And I'm alone in an icy parking lot where I can't run.
I try to walk faster without slipping as I hear Guy#2 continue coming at me. All I could think was: "Don't fall don't fall don't fall, this guy might be serious about taking you with him."
Just as I got to my car, I heard the guy slip on the ice. I only looked at him once I was in the car. He'd stood up and was looking at me.
"You ought to be more careful," he says. Guy#1 laughs and drives off.
I take a breath and start the car. As I leave I hear him yell.
"Bubye, sugar."

Sunday, December 2, 2007

Trops

Went to Tropical Liqueurs with the boys on Friday night. When we got out of the car, it was freezing; so I ran inside quickly.
Once I was through the doors, I stopped and looked around. I wasn't getting anything, so I was just waiting for Mike, Jim and Stephan to catch up with me.
Some guy at the bar turns around and looks thrilled to see a real-live female walk through the door.
"Hey there, baby. How are you? What's up?"
I just stare back at him, too annoyed and cold to respond. Then my boyfriend and his two friends come in the door.
Immediately, his face falls. "Oh," he mumbles, and turns around.
Excuse me, sir, are you hitting on any woman who comes in to Trops alone? Is that your plan?
I'm sick of being seen as worthless just because I'm with guys.